I recently read about a study where researchers determined the name a child is given, and grows up with, can directly influence the person they become as an adult. I mean if you name your kid Blade he will probably found a local chapter for the Hell’s Angels, but name the same kid Corky and he may never know the touch of a woman…
My parents gave me a normal, fairly common name. I haven’t had any world changing accomplishments in my life. Never shook hands with a president. I’m not filthy rich. I’ve been married a couple of time. Maybe that has to do with the not rich thing more than my name, hmmm…
Oh yeah - the study. After reading the article I began thinking about people I had met and their names. I wonder what some of them are doing now.
Lets see there was:
Fooch – I knew him in elementary school. Can’t remember his last name, and I am sure to this day no one knows it. He is a real life Kramer.
Ben Wilde – did his parents have some kind of foresight into his future?
Penny Nichols – one cent, five cents.
Key Chevelle – her dad was a car nut.
Hunter & Trapper – oh, how cute for brothers. Their mom thought so.
Stormy Dawn – maybe it was that “Hey, I’m 1/32 Cherokee” thing you always hear people say.
Candi Cane – She’s probably an exotic dancer or porn star.
Moonbeam Dover – Clever, sounds like moon beamed over. I assume she lives in the top of a Redwood tree somewhere in Humboldt County California now.
Benjamin Dover – Little brother to the “Moonbeam”. Everyone called him Ben.
Kris Krost – I bet she married some guy named Oliver Owt, and now goes by Kris Krost – Owt.
Boot Hill – honest.
Pepsee Kohler – wah-wah-wa…
Wow, parents come up with some weird names for kids. Luckily for the Mrs., and our children, I am nothing like that. I just wanna name our daughter Rhoda Harlee, and if it’s a boy – Darwin Duncan Shane. Say that in your best Wayne Newton voice!
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Sunday, November 18, 2007
The answer is...
Wow, who would have thought that life decision between husband and wife would be so difficult. I love my wife more than anything, but we have a real issue when it comes to the big choices. Ok, ok – when I say big I don’t mean “hey, hunny should we start that family tonight” or “how do you feel we should vote on proposition 184 in the upcoming election” or “do you think we should paint the ceiling beige”.
It’s hard to explain, but here is our typical conversation:
6:00 PM
“How was your day?”
“I don’t know. How was yours?”
“Same as always.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah…”
“Wanna do something tonight?”
“I don’t know. Do you want to?”
“I don’t care… it’s up to you.”
“Ok.”
“Like what?”
“You decide.”
“No, you.”
“I don’t want to…”
6:05 PM
Silence
6:35 PM
“So… what do ya wanna do?”
“I said I didn’t care.”
Silence
7:40 PM
“I’m hungry. You wanna eat?”
“If you want to.”
“What do you feel like?”
“What ever, you decide.”
“I don’t care.”
“Me either.”
Silence
8:10 PM
“You still hungry?”
“I don’t know – are you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Wanna get a pizza?”
“Do you?”
Silence
8:35 PM
“Do you still want a pizza?”
“If you do.”
“Ok, order one.”
Yes! A break through!
“What kind do you want?”
“I don’t care. What do you want?”
Noooooooo!
“Hello, Dominos I would like to order a pizza for delivery…. Ummm, yeah we don’t know. Just a second…. Hunny, I have them on the phone. What do you want?”
“I don’t care. What ever you decide.”
“Yeah, Dominos – surprise us. Thirty five minutes, great.”
Silence
9:20 PM
“How was your pizza?”
“I don’t know how was your?”
“Wanna help me with the dishes?”
“If you want me too…”
Silence
10:00 PM
“Wanna go to bed?”
“If you want to.”
“Well, are you tired?”
“Are you?”
Silence
10:20 PM – in bed
“Are you asleep?”
“Are you?”
“What time do you want to get up tomorrow?”
“I don’t know when do you want to?”
Silence
10:30 PM
“Do you think we should paint the ceiling beige?”
It’s hard to explain, but here is our typical conversation:
6:00 PM
“How was your day?”
“I don’t know. How was yours?”
“Same as always.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah…”
“Wanna do something tonight?”
“I don’t know. Do you want to?”
“I don’t care… it’s up to you.”
“Ok.”
“Like what?”
“You decide.”
“No, you.”
“I don’t want to…”
6:05 PM
Silence
6:35 PM
“So… what do ya wanna do?”
“I said I didn’t care.”
Silence
7:40 PM
“I’m hungry. You wanna eat?”
“If you want to.”
“What do you feel like?”
“What ever, you decide.”
“I don’t care.”
“Me either.”
Silence
8:10 PM
“You still hungry?”
“I don’t know – are you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Wanna get a pizza?”
“Do you?”
Silence
8:35 PM
“Do you still want a pizza?”
“If you do.”
“Ok, order one.”
Yes! A break through!
“What kind do you want?”
“I don’t care. What do you want?”
Noooooooo!
“Hello, Dominos I would like to order a pizza for delivery…. Ummm, yeah we don’t know. Just a second…. Hunny, I have them on the phone. What do you want?”
“I don’t care. What ever you decide.”
“Yeah, Dominos – surprise us. Thirty five minutes, great.”
Silence
9:20 PM
“How was your pizza?”
“I don’t know how was your?”
“Wanna help me with the dishes?”
“If you want me too…”
Silence
10:00 PM
“Wanna go to bed?”
“If you want to.”
“Well, are you tired?”
“Are you?”
Silence
10:20 PM – in bed
“Are you asleep?”
“Are you?”
“What time do you want to get up tomorrow?”
“I don’t know when do you want to?”
Silence
10:30 PM
“Do you think we should paint the ceiling beige?”
Friday, November 2, 2007
I love my shower...
People ask me – “So, how is the new house?”
All I can say is “I love my shower.”
I really, really do. Not in an “I need therapy kinda way”. I just really love it. It was a really big fear for me prior to us moving in. What if I don’t like it? What if the shower head isn’t high enough? What if the water pressure sucks? What if the tile freaks me out? What if it is always cold?”
Rest assured though it is perfect. And it is all mine.
Come on over. Check out the new house. Sit on my couch. Eat my food. Hug my wife. I don’t really care…
Just don’t ask to use my shower.
All I can say is “I love my shower.”
I really, really do. Not in an “I need therapy kinda way”. I just really love it. It was a really big fear for me prior to us moving in. What if I don’t like it? What if the shower head isn’t high enough? What if the water pressure sucks? What if the tile freaks me out? What if it is always cold?”
Rest assured though it is perfect. And it is all mine.
Come on over. Check out the new house. Sit on my couch. Eat my food. Hug my wife. I don’t really care…
Just don’t ask to use my shower.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Is there something wrong with me?
Ok, stop with the sarcasm!
No honestly. Is there something wrong with me? Two TV posts in a row.
So I am home alone tonight - Shannon is at a convention for work - and the TV is keeping me company. I don't mind time alone - I have cable! :)
The news is on. Yeah I said news, but only because I am too lazy to look for the remote. Not really paying attention, but I am sure there is SO much I could be paying attention to. The price of oil, the fires in CA, another recall on Chinese products, a missing kid somewhere in the world, etc. None of this has really phased me, and then it comes on...
I can't believe my eyes! I am drawn to our TV like a moth to my parent's bug zapper. As the reporter begins his monologue I am engulfed by what is being broadcast before me. This has to be the biggest discovery in modern civilization! I kid you not it was a 167 lb hairball! Curses I don't have TiVo! Guess now it will just be "one of those stories grandpa always tells" to my grandkids someday.
No honestly. Is there something wrong with me? Two TV posts in a row.
So I am home alone tonight - Shannon is at a convention for work - and the TV is keeping me company. I don't mind time alone - I have cable! :)
The news is on. Yeah I said news, but only because I am too lazy to look for the remote. Not really paying attention, but I am sure there is SO much I could be paying attention to. The price of oil, the fires in CA, another recall on Chinese products, a missing kid somewhere in the world, etc. None of this has really phased me, and then it comes on...
I can't believe my eyes! I am drawn to our TV like a moth to my parent's bug zapper. As the reporter begins his monologue I am engulfed by what is being broadcast before me. This has to be the biggest discovery in modern civilization! I kid you not it was a 167 lb hairball! Curses I don't have TiVo! Guess now it will just be "one of those stories grandpa always tells" to my grandkids someday.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
RLS
Restless Leg Syndrome
Yeah I think I have it. I don't sleep well and I drive people nuts when I share a seat with them. My legs are constantly moving.
So I saw a commercial for a pill. All was good until the disclaimer - you know all the usual side effects:
"May cause shortness of breath, rash, itching, watery eyes, dry eyes, red eyes, double vision, blurred vision, ringing in ears, elevated tempurature, heart palpitations, nausea, headache, diziness, tiredness, migraines, bloating, gas, loss of appetite, chalky tongue, sweaty gums, hairy toe knuckles, bushy eyebrows, curvature of the spine, back acne, infertility, post nasal drip, pre nasal drip, smelly feet, poor grammer, inability to do algebra, blah, blah, blah..."
Ok, ok I can live with those I'm thinking, and then the last two really caught me off gaurd. I swear this was it:
"Increased sex drive or urge to gamble. When using this product you should not consume alcohol..."
Wait, wait - a product that may increase my sex drive or my urge to gamble BUT should not be taken with alcohol!?! Last time I checked for most people that was alcohol!
Yeah I think I have it. I don't sleep well and I drive people nuts when I share a seat with them. My legs are constantly moving.
So I saw a commercial for a pill. All was good until the disclaimer - you know all the usual side effects:
"May cause shortness of breath, rash, itching, watery eyes, dry eyes, red eyes, double vision, blurred vision, ringing in ears, elevated tempurature, heart palpitations, nausea, headache, diziness, tiredness, migraines, bloating, gas, loss of appetite, chalky tongue, sweaty gums, hairy toe knuckles, bushy eyebrows, curvature of the spine, back acne, infertility, post nasal drip, pre nasal drip, smelly feet, poor grammer, inability to do algebra, blah, blah, blah..."
Ok, ok I can live with those I'm thinking, and then the last two really caught me off gaurd. I swear this was it:
"Increased sex drive or urge to gamble. When using this product you should not consume alcohol..."
Wait, wait - a product that may increase my sex drive or my urge to gamble BUT should not be taken with alcohol!?! Last time I checked for most people that was alcohol!
Monday, October 22, 2007
JUNK!
So we are preparing to move - hopefully this week. And the question that keeps coming to mind is where did all this junk come from? I mean come on I take out the trash several times a week. Sometimes I even through out more than what is in the can. If I don't think we need it it is out by the curb.
You know I can understand our draw with 107 keys, 12 rolls of tape - none new, a pocket knife, a business card for a plumber, crayons, a ball of used tin-foil, a AA battery, and some toenail clippings, but what about all the "big" stuff? Where did all this come from? Did we buy it? Do we need it? How did it get here?
I think my wife smuggles it in. It seems to be a bigger problem than securing the US borders.
I questioned Shannon - "Have you been ordering from QVC again?"
"No, why?" she replies.
"Cause I don't remember buying this..." I say puzzling.
"Oh that - your mom gave it to us for our anniversary."
"Why would my mom get us the Suzanne Somer's Thighmaster Gold edition?"
"Ummm... maybe she got it on easy pay with free shipping..."
"Are you kidding me!?!"
"No, now put it next to the Paula Deen 217 pc. cookware set your grandfather gave us for Hanukkah..."
"Hey - wait! We aren't Jewish!"
You know I can understand our draw with 107 keys, 12 rolls of tape - none new, a pocket knife, a business card for a plumber, crayons, a ball of used tin-foil, a AA battery, and some toenail clippings, but what about all the "big" stuff? Where did all this come from? Did we buy it? Do we need it? How did it get here?
I think my wife smuggles it in. It seems to be a bigger problem than securing the US borders.
I questioned Shannon - "Have you been ordering from QVC again?"
"No, why?" she replies.
"Cause I don't remember buying this..." I say puzzling.
"Oh that - your mom gave it to us for our anniversary."
"Why would my mom get us the Suzanne Somer's Thighmaster Gold edition?"
"Ummm... maybe she got it on easy pay with free shipping..."
"Are you kidding me!?!"
"No, now put it next to the Paula Deen 217 pc. cookware set your grandfather gave us for Hanukkah..."
"Hey - wait! We aren't Jewish!"
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
El Camirod, El Carodder, Elky - Highboy?
No idea what you would call this. All I know is that a full a full-size version is being built by a guy on the H.A.M.B. His may not look exactly like this when done, but when I saw the initial "spy photos" I just had to draw up "my" finished version. It started life as a '59 El Camino that is now narrowed and chopped. It sits on a rolling chassis remenisant of the Mysterion show car, stuffed with your pick of any vintage V-8 with custom headers and an intake setup that looks like it came off of a pipe organ. It would have a custom mix yellow / gold paint with white tuck 'n roll interior, white 3 spoke steering wheel, and big shifter. And what show carm would be complete without a custom tube grill and quad headlights!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
